For some of us it can be a monumental challenge to stick to a training routine during the holiday season. Hopefully the habit of day to day workout sessions and the desire to get that total body 'ahh, that felt good' workout in will help you through the holidays. If not, here are a few quick tips to bridge the gap.

1) Be the early bird. Get up, get out and get your workout in. If you plan for training later in the day, there is a good chance and an unplanned obligation will work its way into your day.

2) Keep it simple. With family, social and work obligations, our schedules quickly fill to the brim. Make time for yourself to workout, but keep the parameters simple. Choose a workout mode that is most likely to fit in your day. Running or speed walking are easy, quick options that don't depend on gym or pool hours.

3) Change it up. If you have been swimming, cycling and running all year, don't be afraid to change up what you do to train. Motivation (or lack thereof) can get in the way of working out. These is when the cookies calling can do the most damage. Instead, aim yourself with the strategy of a new, fresh athletic pursuit. Your motivation will stay high and your hunger to get back out and swim, bike and run will be recharged. Strength training or group classes at the gym are easy options. If you live in a snowy climate, work with mother nature. Gear up and snowshoe or cross country ski. Whatever you do, remember why you started to workout in the first place. Hopefully, your list of reasons included having fun!

Enjoy the holidays, be safe and remember to take care of yourself.

The Challenge

After being out of triathlon competition for over a year now, I am going to get back out and race in 2009. While I have been in and out of shape a few times in my twenty years of racing, I feel like this is likely to be the hardest 'comeback' of my life.

I've barely gotten wet in the pool, but I have spied the ol' familiar black line for some laps. I'm running again, with a lot of huffing and puffing. I'm on the bike willing the cranks around and promising myself there will be less of me come race day. I love being out there and I love to train. Still, getting back to a point where the training is routine and as integral as brushing my teeth is the current struggle. I have a lot of limitations that I didn't have before. This means I have to be flexible and adjust to how my body feels on a daily basis in a hyper sensitive way. The ol' back is temperamental and a flare up could set me back for weeks, so it is a fine line to walk. Those limitations can play a little mind game with you. The ever familiar, 'am I doing enough?' or 'am I working hard enough' ?

There seem to be so many more demands on my time than ever. (isn't it that way for everyone!) I start to wonder if I can 'get back to' the way it was. Then I realize, I don't need to. It is time to forge the way it will be for me now. If you find yourself struggling at all with your daily workouts...just getting outside, to the gym or the pool, you're not alone. Even though the thought of toeing the line with my peers in a few months scares the tar out of me, my life is full with a lot of other great things that are pulling me every which way. I think that it why so many of us are drawn to triathlon in the first place, it is a means of balancing out our lives. I suspect I will find that 'balance' again, but right now I'm teetering and tottering all over the place and that is OK. There are many more dimensions to me than swim, bike, run and they are just as important.

Vote Hypercat Racing for "Best of the Bay"

Election day has come and gone, but there is still some very important voting to do!

Competitor magazine has opened the polls for its upcoming “Best of the Bay” issue.

In January 2009, Competitor magazine will unveil the winners of its annual "Best of the Bay" survey. As you probably know, I am a full time coach working with runners, cyclists, duathletes and triathletes through my coaching company, Hypercat Racing. Along with my husband, "Coach Phil," I would be honored to have your support and your vote. As a boutique coaching business, we take great pride in working with you and other athletes seeking to bring out the potential that lies within.

Please cast your vote for Hypercat Racing for the category best
“Personal Trainer / Training Program.” Thank you!

Get Out and Vote!

Whatever your party, your political leaning, your cause...exercise your right to vote! Our families and our forefathers and mothers fought for this precious right. Use it!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

I was Runnang!

I feel a little like Tom Hank's character in Forrest Gump.
I'm about to bust out of my leg braces and embark on a run where there is no finish line. Dr. Saal suggested that I forgo running for the past several months to allow any excess inflammation in my back some time to subside. So, after an extended period of letting my run shoes air out and gather dust, I laced up and headed out the door.

I put on my 'modified' running outfit. My bum doesn't quite fit properly in my regular running shorts so I opted for the more modest coverage of a capri tights. Black is supposed to be slimming, but I am not sure anything black is much help for my expanded Scandinavian assets. Fortuneately those extra pounds are nothing a few more miles and salads won't eradicate.

The run started with a fifteen minute walk and then I commenced something resembling a run. Yippee! My heart was pumping and my breathing accelerated. Ah, to be running again. Frankly, my back really wasn't celebrating in my joyous return-to-running party. Still, there is always at least one party pooper, right? All I have to say, in my best
Gump accent, "I was RUNNANG!"

Tour De Max

The Tour de Max is a bicyle ride in memory of a lady named Max Seales Yonker. I didn't know Max, but she sounds like she was one heck of a woman. Max passed away from cancer in May of 2005. The tour and the Max Seales Yonker Foundation was established by her friends and family to keep her memory alive and to raise funds for various cancer fighting organizations. Funds raised by MSYF provide grants to organizations like the Lance Armstrong Foundation and Susan G. Komen Foundation.

The Tour de Max is an extremely challenging ride than tours the Santa Cruz Mountains. The metric century is one of the toughest organized charity rides that I have ever ridden. As I struggled over the unforgiving climbs known to locals at Page Mill Rd and Tunitas Creek among others, I seriously questioned if I had the fitness to turn the crank just one more revolution. These moments gave pause and the gratitude that I am able, no matter what speed or at what fitness, to use my body athletically.

As the ride progressed and the fatigue accumulated in my body, I thought many times about friends and family I have lost to cancer. I thought about Xterra champion, Jamie Whitmore, who is currently in her own brutal race against cancer. I know Jamie would give anything to be on her bike, willing her legs to churn the cranks and he heart to beat as fast as it can pump.

The next time you walk, ride a bike, do a cartwheel, toss a frisbee, run around the block or pick up your child or pet, be grateful for what you CAN do. Then think about getting out and supporting some charity events, like a walk, run or bike ride. It is good for you and unfortuneately, chances are, someone you know will someday need help from an organization like those supported by the Max Seales Yonkers Foundation.

Raider Nation!

Friend and sponsor, Zennie Abraham (Sports Business Simulations) surprised me with an offer to go to the Coliseum for my first Oakland Raiders football game yesterday. We had some sweet club seats and got to witness the very first pre-season game, the Raiders vs the 49ers. Of course I have been known to cheer and support the 49ers (shhhh!) but since I do live in the East Bay, it was all about the silver and black, baby!

I have to admit, there is something very scary about being dressed in black and mingling with crowds of other people dressed in silver and black. I guess that's the point. Oakland is scary. The fans are scary and the team, yup, scary. I love it!

Leave it to me to notice the Raider (#32) warming up on a stationary bike. I just thought that was cool.

In between halfs, I ran into my USF Sport management cohort-mate, Adam. He is currently interning with the Raiders and I couldn't resist getting a quick photo. Go Adam!

Thank so much Zennie for sharing your passion for the NFL with me!

The Picture is Complete

Today I had a follow-up visit with Dr. Jeff Saul at S.O.A.R in Redwood City. The purpose was simply to let the doc know how the last round of epidural injections worked. I also wanted to ask the doctor about returning to running.

Nothing particularly exciting happened at the appointment, but I left feeling like a weight had lifted off my shoulders. At this point we know that I have extremely degenerated disc and there is no way to 'fix it.' The doctor suggested that I avoid running for 12 weeks to enable my body to get to a point of minimal inflammation. (This break was intended to help me be able to return to a decent level of normal function as opposed to an outcome related to training or racing). I did ask the doc if I would do damage by running again. His answer was no, BUT, he said I would know very quickly if I would be able to run, train or race. It is pretty simple, the degeneration may continue to significantly limit my ability to train or perform and a high level. I have to accept what I am, what I have and move on.

Why would I feel relieved and even happy after leaving the doctor's office? (especially considering the 'non-outcome' of the appointment). Well, after five years of battling the back, I can see exactly what I am working with. My option is to try. I can try training and see what happens. I do have pain every day (regardless of training), so I'm not certain where an attempt to return to running and a full regimen of triathlon training will lead. No point in worrying or belly aching over it though. I'm going to wait another week or two and try some running.

The body is an amazing thing. I'm not counting myself out just yet. If my competition is smart, they won't either. :-)

Vineman in Pictures

It was a terrific feeling to be amongst friends and athletes at last week's Vineman triathlon races. I entered the "Aquabike" which is a unique (and relatively new) multisport event that combines swimming and cycling. In addition to the Full Vineman Ironman distance event and Barb's Race (half-ironman triathlon), race organizers also put on the Full and Half Vineman Aquabike.





Having not raced in such a long time, it really was a treat to get back to the routine of prepping gear, getting up early and revving up for a day of competition. I wasn't particularly anxious for the race, but I think that has a lot to do with the fact that I know where my fitness is and isn't. I was aiming to savor the experience, support other racers and just see what would come together.

At the end of the race, I was wiped and plenty satisfied with 'just' a swim and bike. I finished 3rd woman overall (2nd 30-39) and 8th among everyone.

While I had really enjoyed racing, a lot more fun was ahead. Phil, our friend Tilden and various folks from the SF Tri Club volunteered at a run aid station for the Full Vineman triathletes. Phil and I started our volunteers duties at 2pm and stayed until the very last competitors past by us at around 11 pm. It was quite amazing to see each athlete's personal struggles along the way.

Here's Coach Phil with his 'shower' hose. Although it looks like he is watering somebody's flower garden, Coach Phil is eagerly waiting some sweaty customers.





It was mighty toasty for the athletes and Coach Phil offered the willing a nice, cool rinse and some respite from the afternoon sun. As the afternoon sun gave way to the cooler hours of the evening twilight, we heard a lot of interesting requests and comments from athletes. Among the most memorable and most frequent:

1) Will you marry me?
2) How many ounces are in this cup?
3) How many calories are in this?
4) I owe you guys dinner.
5) Where's the turnaround?

Ahhhhh!

As the day wore on, we began to recognize each of the athletes. On this three loop course, our aid station was located before a turn around which meant we would serve each and every athletes six times throughout the race. Interacting with the athletes gave me great perspective for their hard work on the race course and the work of the volunteers supporting them.

Once the sun set and the crickets finished their serenade, it became very dark and very lonely on that wine country road. Without ambiant light or street lights runners were reduced to shuffling in the dark. Although some athletes had headlamps, the only way you could 'see' folks was by the glowy necklaces worn around their necks. (provided by the race organizers for safety). It was very eery to see glowing circles, sometimes solo and sometimes in small groups, slowly advancing towards us. We did our best to make noise, provide nourishment and enthusiastic encouragement beside the ambiance of our laterns.

Congratulations to each and every Vineman athlete. Special congrats to friends Bill and Flavio of Ventura's Rincon Triathlon Club. Bill earned another Ironman finish to tatoo on his arm and Flavio placed first place in the Men 55-59 age group. Way to go guys!

New Trails, Happy Tails

I really miss running. I love to run on trails. Being surrounded by nature, its smells and the precious quiet time to sort through my thoughts. Nothing can really replace running, but I've developed a fondness for walking and hiking trails. I realized this week how few trails I have actually explored. In the past I would run the same routes week after week, month after month and year after year. Heaven forbid I stop for a moment, open a gate, close it and explore.
I had no idea what I was missing.
It is amazing what you see, when you slow down and walk.


Bella waiting for me to hurry up and catch up so we can go cow hunting.
Zola has already raced up the trail leaving Bella and I lagging behind.

Aquatic Surprises

One great thing about being a triathlete is that you always have three sports to train. If your body is broken in one sport, you have another option.

Usually if I am not racing triathlons, you can find me at a 5k, 10k, 1/2 marathon or some trail run race. Running has always been a religion of sorts, for me. Since the age of 13, I have chosen running races as my recreation of choice. Its been hard not being able to go run or race when I want to. Although I have had set-ups over my career that have come in the form of injuries, I have always known I would be back. This time, I don't know if I will be back to competitive running but I'm not wasting anytime worrying about that though. I can swim and bike!

Saturday I did something I have never done before. I signed up two open water swim races held back to back at the Lake Del Valle Aqua Challenge in Livermore, CA. I swam the .5 mile and 1 mile swim. Going to Lake Del Valle was a real treat. Not only was it a beautiful place to swim and to hang out, but I was able to meet new people and spend time with athletes. I was especially touched when friend Tilden Moschetti made the drive from San Francisco to come out and support me and some of his other friends. Thanks, Tilden!



There were a lot of brand new triathletes training as part of a Team in Training group as well as many seasoned swimmers. I had no expectations for either swim other than swimming to finish the event. A nice surpise was placing 2nd in the wetsuit division in the .5 mile and 3rd place in the 1 mile. It's not about the awards, but it IS fun to win something to represent your efforts.
Understand I have never 'placed' in a swimming event, so this was like winning the aquatic lottery!

I was tickled to share some post race laughs and conversation with fellow pro, Eileen Swanson and her hubby, Reid. Eileen ripped it up and won the 2 mile swim and Reid won his age group in the 2 mile as well. Reid was just as surprised as I was to win a medal. Naturally we were all smiles. Aquatic surprises do that for you!

Thought for Today

"Let us be of good cheer remembering that the misfortunes
hardest to bear are those which never happen."

-James Russell Lowell

Red Disc of Happiness

This week I went in for epidural cortisone injections to relieve pain and inflammation in my back. Unfortuneatly this is not the first time in the past year that I have undergone the procedures, but I think I intend for it to be my last.

After meeting with my doctor, a physiatrist who specializes in conditions like mine, he suggested that I try injections one more time to get some relief. Understand that these injections don't fix anything, but serve more as a band-aid. The idea being, in my case, to gain some pain-free time so I can work on strengthening the back and core some more. Yes, I have already tried this before, but sometimes you have to retrace your steps and try again.

Rather than concern myself too much about the outcome. (ie, Will I be able to train and compete again as I once was able), I have been taking everything one step and one day at a time. Of utmost importance to me, has been a refocusing of all my energy to everything positive. I've always been an eternal optimist, but I can honestly say that pain has a way of leaching those positive vibes from deep within.

Over the past few months, as I have watched my body deteroriate and expand, I have experienced those positive energies turn to more negative energies. Clearly that is no way to pull one's self together! So...I resolved to see only the positive and be the vibrant personality that is the real me. Not the down in the dumps, busted up triathlete that I was feeling like.

So much of feeling positive and being positive is surrounding yourself with that which brings you joy. For me, being outdoors and spending time with my furry friends is among the chart toppers. Everyday this week my husband and I have been going to the local dog park with our chihuahuas, Zola and Bella. Admittedly we have to keep a close eye on the girls as other larger, canine park visitors might mistake them for a tasty (albeit bony) snack. Still, it is worth everything to watch Zola chase and retrieve her red frisbee.

It's quite a sight to see a small chihuaha race with all her might to retrieve the flying red disc. It makes me laugh and it makes her appear to be the most fulfilled dog in the world. Zola's red disc of happiness is wonderful medicine. It give me joy to see her loving life and it reminds me that were I able to train, I would miss this opportunity to share the time with her, Bella and Philip.

I was able to get in the pool for some splashing around yesterday. I won't say I did 'just X" or 'only Y' as I might have in the past. What I accomplished was a U-turn in attitude, a reversion back to the old positive me, but with a new appreciation for what a red disc of happiness can be.

Riding with History

I've been enjoying my time here in Ventura. I'm taking some time to digest my back diagnosis and figure out how to cope with the reality of a body that has limitations. The doctor is not optimistic that I can return to competitive running or racing, but doctor's don't always have the final word. The great thing about triathlon is that there are three sports. I'll be grateful for what I can do and stay positive.

While my religion is now at least temporarily banned (running has always been my church), I can still ride and swim. So here I am, at the in-laws taking some time to re-group with bike, goggles and my chihuahua, Zola Budd, in tow.

I love the quiet thinking time I have while riding the roads of Ventura County. There seems to be fewer cyclists and distractions compared to the Bay Area. I don't feel the need to test or prove myself and can just focus on being grateful to ride.

One of my favorite routes starts in Ventura, heads to Santa Paula, then to Ojai on 150 and then down the Ventura River Trail bike path to the ocean. Yesterday, I came upon a family riding their cruisers and MTBs on the path. My old self would have politely but quickly passed them by to continue on with my training session. On this day, I slowed down and I'm glad I did.

I ended up having a terrific conversation with "Mike." We talked about Ventura, getting married, kids, work, the cameraderie of sport and a little about triathlon. Mike shared that he was the guy who finished between Kathleen McCartney and Julie Moss at the 1982 Hawaii Ironman. How cool is that! He was a guy who was part of triathlon in the early days and finished smack in the middle of one of the sports' most famous moments. (If you are not familiar with the story, Julie Moss crawled to the Ironman finishline. As she painfully made her way there, Kathleen McCartney ran past her for the win) Pretty neat stuff. Mike says he does triathlons now and then, but always finds it hard to get into run shape. (Don't we all!?!).

I was happy that Mike was cruising along the bike path and not running that day. He gave me something to smile about until I reached the breathtaking views at the coast. Then my smile became a wide toothy grin.

I'm currently in the Ventura/Santa Barbara, Calif. area to escape for a week or two to some of my favorite training haunts. I arrived in Ventura on Friday night and not a moment too soon. It was a rough week. I went in for another MRI to get some updated pictures of my back. The pictures were telling and the story not the type you want to write for yourself.

I am moving beyond the negative and go forward, but here is the situation. The last disc in my spine, the L-5/S-1 disc, is toast. When we saw the MRI pictures in April of 2007, the disc was in bad shape so I was expecting to see more of the same in the new pictures. However, I wasn't expecting to see the level of degeneration that exists. Basically the doctor said that he has never seen an athlete with my condition return to competitive running (or triathlon for that matter).

Naturally this puts me in a very weird space. Do I read the writing on the wall and 'retire' or do I try to work around this back thing and return to racing? I wish the answer were cut and dry.

The doctor explained that currently the vertebrae are slipping on the disc casings. (There is no disc to absorb impact, so the vertebrae are literally moving around/sliding on the disc casings like riding a flat tire on the rims. This causes a lot of pain). The doc said that it is possible that when the casings 'dry out' I may have reduced pain and with that reduced pain the door might open for the possibility of running again. How fast or how competitive? There is no answer to that.

How long might it take for the disc casings to dry out? Who knows. Could be months, could be a year or two. It is entirely possible that I could return to competition at a decent level down the road, but we don't know how long that road is.

Where do I go from here? The doctor has recommended that I undergo another round of epidural and facet block cortisone shots. That will help calm the inflammation and give me some relief so I can work on more strength training. He suggests that I don't run for 12 weeks or do anything of significant impact during that time. Of course, I am also advised to do as much core strength training as possible. I can swim and bike as tolerable.

I've decided that all I can do is focus on what I can do and let the rest take care of itself. I'm spending almost two weeks in Ventura clearing my head and enjoying my time on the bike and in the water. Although it is not realistic to lay out a race schedule for triathlon or running for the remainder of '08 at this point, I am trying to put together an event schedule for swimming and cycling events. At minimum I get to be out there enjoying the cameraderie of sport and maintain a semblance of the lifestyle that I have lived for so long.

I watched the US Olympic Trials for gymnastics on tv the past two nights. It was very inspiring to hear the stories of Alicia Sacramone and Chelsea Memmel. Granted their stories are entirely different than mine, but the fact that they overcame significant adversity helps me in trying to do the same. After all 'trying' is all any of us can do.

I'll be out swimming and riding tomorrow morning and being thankful for whatever my body will allow me to do. In case you are wondering, yes, I have a lot of other interests and pursuits. However, when something is an integral part of who you are and how you live, letting it go and moving on is extremely difficult. For me, I think I can let go of the competition, but losing the fitness and the body that goes with it terrifies me.

My Back Diagnosis up until this point...

I can't say that it's my favorite thing to blog about my back. There are definetley more uplifting things to relate than doctor's appointments and discussions related to the potential end point of my professional racing career.

Still, this my reality and why sugar coat it. My hope is that other athletes who might face similiar issues will find something useful in my posts. Frankly, I also hope that healthy athletes will recognize how incredibly blessed they are to be able to participate in sports - at whatever level.
My tolerance for whining and excuses is ever so thin these days.

Up until now, my diagnosis has been degenerative disc disease and facet syndrome. Here are two links that a friend sent me that do a good job of explaining what those conditions mean.
There are two short videos.

http://www.laserspineinstitute.com/iplayer/facetsyndrome

http://www.laserspineinstitute.com/iplayer/ddd

Today, I returned to S.O.A.R in Redwood City to see Dr. Jeff Saal. I was referred to Dr. Saal over a year ago by well known cycling physician, Dr. Andy Pruit. I haven't had the opportunity to be seen by Dr. Pruit, but he assured me that the folks at S.O.A.R are among the best.

Based on the information I shared with Dr. Saal, he suggested I be scheduled for yet another MRI (my 3rd) and another follow-up visit with him. My last MRI was over a year ago so the intent of this new MRI is to compare it to the previous. We will be looking for any changes and further deteroriation of my condition.

Dr. Saal wasn't all doomsday, but fairly pragmatic and realistic. Let's just say he wasn't forseeing me competing much more as a professional triathlete. He suggested it was time for me to start 're-creating' myself and thinking about becoming a 'recreational' athlete. He said I could live a 'normal life.' I will have to 'adjust' my expectations and do anything I can to not aggravate my back.

I'm not throwing in the towel yet. Naturally it is prudent to wait for next week's MRI and follow-up diagnosis. The doc wants to do another round of injections and further exploration of strength training and non-impact training. I'm game for that. After 5 years of struggles I'm not going to quit. It is no secret to anyone who has followed my career, that I have a bit of a 'lackluster' swim. That is about to change.

Pain in the Back

It would be an understatement to say that I am frustrated. In 2003 I had the first hints of something not being 'right' with my back. At first it was a little twinge that showed up in my lower back. What has transpired since 2003 includes a never ending treadmill of trips to chiropractors, physical therapists and specialists. I've had three MRIs, hundreds of adjustments, traction therapy for my neck and traction therapy for my back. I've taken breaks from swimming, time off from cycling and time off from running. I've tried complete rest. (By the way, complete rest = weight gain!).

I've been to several top notch chiropractors, each who has tried to help me diagnose and treat my back. I've had the pleasure of working with some of the best physical therapists in the Bay Area. Each has been optimistic that they could help me become stronger than the definition of strong itself. I've been diagnosed with a degenerated disc at L-5 / S-1 and the idea is to shore up the core so that I don't unnecessarily move that area.

At first I avoided any meds. Then I relented because the pain was so bad and went with some ibuprofen. I've iced thousands of times. I've stretched. I've strengthened. I've tried yoga, dabbled in pilates. I've tried mental training exercises. I've read scores of books. Everything from looking at food as the root of inflammation to more general 'pain free living' books.
Now, I pop Voltaren with increasing frequency. Other than making my stomach feel like poo, I'm not sure those things help at all either.

Last year I took a big leap and opted for cortizone injections in my back. (A lot of fun, let me tell you). The cortizone was intended to reduce the inflammation and 'calm down' the area in which the pain was likely to be originating.

My first injections were in April 2007. It was very scary to go to the surgery center.
Who likes needles anyway? I certainly don't. Just getting an IV line makes my stomach twist into pretzels.

I survived the procedures without out too much trauma and within the first week improvement was significant. I felt like a brand new person. It is amazing how one's demeanor changes when pain fills your life. After those injections I was like the old, dynamic, 'real me' once again. I had some brief glimpses of the athletic prowess that lies within. I went up to Oregon and competed in the Pacific Crest Half Ironman triathlon. I posted the fastest 56 mile bike split of my career and got onto the run with a 5+ minute lead. I wasn't able to hold that lead and finished in 3rd, but that day showed me that I still had it and anything was possible.

Unfortuneately the cortizone effects were short lived. I went back in for repeat injections in September. The treatnebts had little positive effect. Just five weeks later, with the ITU duathlon world championships on the schedule, I was forced just a day before my flight to try a third emergency round of shots. Though the pain was slightly diminished my function was limited. I struggled through the world championships and finished 19th.

Since October of 2007, I have not raced. I have had a difficult time of walking, putting on my pants or training at all. Over the past few months, frustrated by a 20 pound gain in weight, I determined that 'rest' was doing nothing for my back or my former iron-body. I've gone back to strength training and cycling. Next week I will try swimming. The thing that is so frustrating is that I can function in certain situations with manageable pain, but then for no real reason, the next minute I struggle to walk.

Doctors have said I have a degenerative disc condition. I know I have issues with nerves getting pinched. (I'm guessing that's why I get periodioc blinding pain, easily fall for lack of motor control and the fact that putting on my socks might as well be an olympic gymnastic event).

I'm slowly adding more volume to my training, but I am still in pain. Sitting is horrid on my back, moving is better than not moving. Its like a horrible nightmare of closed doors. I keep trying to open doors but am hitting a brick wall.

I just called my specialist to try and get another appointment. Maybe I need to discuss surgery, something that scares the tar out of me. I won't even touch on the 'what ifs' of that one.

Ultimately, the choice is still mine. Sit inside, get fat and be in pain or go out and ride and deal with it. Perhaps when I get back from my ride the doctors will have called and another chapter will be added to this saga. Believe me, I've kept the story short. Beside pain and frustration the other theme that has stayed with me over 1800 days of struggle is optimism. I still believe I can lick this.

One of those training days

Frequently people say to me, "I would love to just train for triathlons" when talking with me about my status as a professional triathlete. First of all, I don't think there are many pros who 'just' train for triathlon. Reality is, unless you are at the top of the sport and consistently earning a prize money paycheck and/or bonuses from sponsors, you aren't 'just' training.
As much as I would love to tell you that I make big bucks from triathlon, that just isn't the case. Not yet anyway!

Secondly, I would suggest that when people say they would love to be 'just training' they might reconsider if they really knew what they were asking for. Just because a weekend of swimming, cycling and running can be a tremendous amount of fun doesn't mean that training day after day, week after week, month after month and year after year is the best thing on the planet.
Like any pursuit, (I don't like to refer to triathlon as a job!), there is a day-to-day grind aspect of training for triathlons, especially when you are training solo.

Don't get me wrong. I love training, I love competition and I love the sport of triathlon. Why else would I continue to struggle and try to find a way to work with a degenerative disc condition that leaves me nearly unable to get out of bed, put on my pants and shoes or pick up my cat or dog off the floor? I love being fit, the pursuit of being the best one can be and seeing what the human body can do. What I am getting at, is that not every day is all peaches and powerbar gel.

Yesterday was 'one of those days'. If you are an endurance athlete, I don't even need to continue. You know what I mean.

I took an extraordinary amount of time to get myself dressed, fed and ready to get on the bike. The marine layer of fog was particularly thick and the winds gusty and unpredictable. When I first started my ride, I found myself thinking, "ugh, this isn't what I'd hoped for." I reminded myself the weather was part of the gig and like thousands of other workouts, you sometimes just have to get it done. So I did. Or should I say, so I tried.

I got about 20 miles into my ride and unexpectedly hit a very long stretch of road that was under construction. The road had been stripped down to the grooves leaving the shoulder unridable and downright dangerous. We are talking several inches of loose sand and gravel.
The condition of the shoulder forced me to ride a bit further into the lane that I would have liked. I am a very aware, skilled and courteous cyclist, but when conditions are dangerous you have to protect yourself and ride accordingly. I had a few folks fully lay on their horns right when they were even with me. Nice. The sound of the Escalade horn nearly caused my heart to seize. Having a heart attack on the bike, now there is a way to go.

Minutes later I felt the sinking feeling that comes with a rear flat tire. Part of the job. Part of training. I tried to get over as far as possible and went to work fixing the tire. Now, with the tell tale dirty hands, clothing and cold shill from stopping I got back on the bike and headed onward.

Just as I was starting to get back in the groove, a mere five or so minutes later, I felt that ominous sinking feeling again. Another flat tire. The road was so rough, riddled with pot holes and sharp edges, I guess my tires just weren't holding up. I stopped and sat on a man hole atop of pile of dirt and got to work.

A few spent C02 cartridges and an arm workout with the mini-pump later, I was set to go. I was riding my Blue T14 time trial bike and had two hand positions, on the aerobars or on the bull horns. Well, no sooner had I got back in the saddle did I realize that my brake lever (on the bull horn) was completely loose. The brake still worked, but every groove and bump in the tore-up road was giggling my brake lever into circles. Now, I had a potentially dangerous situation with a loose part. I was riding an a wickedly rough downhill slope that without braking could see me hit some pretty high speeds with little effort. Speed, very rough road and squirrely brake levers are not an optimal situation.

I stopped again and pulled out a wrench to see if I could tighten the pesky brake lever. No dice. I couldn't fix it. I made the best of it and carefully made my way back home albeit on a bit of a shortened ride.

My ride experience is not atypical of any other triathletes. Everyone gets flat tires and has mechanical issues. We all have 'one of those training days.' It is those days that do make training a grind on some days. Still, without those days you don't have the glorious, makes-it-all-worth-it training days either. So, with that I am off to get on my bike and start a new day.
I bet this one will be a lot better. Today I am riding my Blue R6 while my T14 sees the bike doctor.

Blue Bicycle's Ryan Barnett Hit By Truck before Roswell Criterium

Yesterday was like Christmas in May. My Blue T16 arrived from UPS. It is sweet time trial bike that I will proudly race on later this season. Before I was about to call and thank Ryan Barnett, my awesome sponsor at Blue bicycles, I got distracted surfing SlowTwitch.com.

My attention was caught by the picture to the left and I came across an article about Ryan being hit by a truck. He was hit by a landscaping truck while warming up for a crit last Saturday night. Currently Ryan is at the Shephard Spinal Center in Atlanta.
According to his co-worker, he will undergo surgery today or tomorrow and his prognosis is mixed.
Please think of and pray for Ryan. He has a tough road ahead of him and his family. We can only hope that his athletic will and determination will serve him equally as well in recovery.


http://www.slowtwitch.com/News/Ryan_Barnett_seriously_injured_344.html

Ride for Jamie

Xterra Champion Jamie Whitmore is battling a cancerous pelvic tumor.
Friends and supporters are sponsoring a ride this weekend to raise funds to help defray medical costs. Check out the link, grab your wallet, gear up and ride for Jamie.

Ride for Jamie

Motivation by the Pound

In the past if I missed a day or two of training I would go into a complete melt-down. "Oh, the loss of fitness," or "yikes I might gain weight." Since the engagement last September, let's just say I have had a bit of a transition in my life.

I've been trying to overcome the disc issues with my back with lots of physical therapy, while also starting the pursuit of my masters degree, expanding my coaching business and planning a destination wedding. Add to that, the purchase of a new car and the sale of my beloved convertible, as well as the usual veterinarian appointments, business meetings and school functions. Let's just say I didn't really 'miss' the triathlon training. I didn't have time to miss it.

Now we are two weeks away from the wedding. I am starting to see the light and the pounds. Yup, I gained a little cushion. Good for the boobs looking great in the wedding dress. Bad for fitting into lycra. Boo-hoo.

Let's just say I am now literally chomping at the bit to start training in earnest once again.
I really don't know what I will be able to do. I don't know if I can run, especially since the pain frequently prevents me standing up or walking properly. I have come to terms with the fact that my body has some serious limitations. I'm teaching myself to move differently and to avoid stressing my back in unnecessary ways. Life is about compromise.

As soon as the wedding is over I will be getting back in the pool, on the bike and lacing up the run shoes. Just doing the three sports in some fashion will be a major accomplishment. You won't ever hear me say "I only" or "I just" did x, y or z. I won't take any training session or race for granted regardless of the outcome.

Next month I will be at Sea Otter as well as Wildflower, but I won't be racing. I'll be volunteering, coaching other athletes and drawing inspiration to motivate me through the rough patches. I'm aiming to try and put my body together for some late summer and late season racing. I'll have a new name and a new beginning. Let's see if I can build a new body to match.

A quote for thought...

"Life's blows cannot break a person whose spirit
is warmed at the fire of enthusiasm."
-Norman Vincent Peale

Remembering Matt

Victim 'always trying to do the hardest thing'


I don't like the headline. I doubt Matt would either. Though he was accidently hit by a police car yesterday, he was hardly a victim, he was a driven and dynamic who set and achieved his goals. I prefer to remember Matt as the champion that he aimed to be, never a victim.

Rest in Peace.

Sheriff's Vehicle Strikes, Kills Two Cyclists

I've gotten used to reading stories about people you don't know who get hit while riding their bike. This evening I saw the news. I know the two cyclists who lost their lives doing what they love. My heart goes out to Kristy's family, to her friend Clas Bjorling and to Matt Peterson's family.

What Happens When You Walk

I woke up on January 19, 2008 and I couldn't get out of bed. I couldn't sit up. Standing couldn't happen and walking was not an option. Talk about loss of control.

I was in so much pain, I can't even describe what it felt like.

It took me twenty minutes to crawl to the bathroom and another 15 minutes to climb into the tub. I wasn't comfortable in any position for hours. Since then it has been a return to physical therapy and a break from the 'normal' swim, bike, run regimen.

You don't have to be an athlete to comprehend what it might be like to lose control of your own body. I can't say I ever imagined what that means, but now I know. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Since then I have cleared my race schedule. I'm back in physical therapy at Active Care.
I'm doing a lot of strength work and I'm walking. Yup. Walking.

In the context of running and triathlon, folks seem to place some huge negative on walking during a race. To them I would say, be grateful you can walk and don't take that gift for granted. Running? Even a more beautiful and special gift! If you run, race, do triathlons etc, I would encourage you to censor your whining. As I tell myself, 'get over yourself.'

Try not to diminish any accomplishments you achieve. Celebrate your wins. (I'm talking about the small successes in everyday life. Not just the personal bests, race wins, finishes, promotions etc.)

Be happy you can ambulate. If you choose to do so, be happy you can train. Be grateful you can race. Don't minimize, compare or diminish your athletic pursuits because you think you can do better. If that is the case, do better. Don't talk about it what you should do, could do or would do. Just do and do it quietly. Be sensitive to those around you who might not be able to do what you do.

Why I am on this soapbox?

Being 'broken' I've had a rough go with this back issue...now five years old. I've gained tremendouse perspective and I truly recognize what I have been able to do in the past is an enormous blessing. Still, I do find myself thinking how much this back thing (to put it bluntly) sucks.

I went out for a walk with Zola a couple days ago. I ran into a neighbor who was sitting in the passenger seat of a parked car. I hadn't talked to "Ricky" for a good year. It turns out Ricky has undergone spine surgery. He has limited sensitivity in his legs, hasn't walked into his own backyard or driven his shiny, new truck in over a year. While I talked with Ricky, he spent a good part of 15 minutes trying to move and get out of the truck he was sitting in.

Here I am thinking I am just in the worst shape ever. I am fat, in pain constantly, can't move well and so on. Ricky on the other hand, can't feel that his shoe has fallen off, is hanging on the side of the open truck door and is waiting for a walker and crutches to make it the 20 feet to his front door.

Ricky said to me, "Yo Rachel. I see you cruising by and I think to myself, I want to be out there with her someday."

And to think I was complaining that 'all I can do' is walk.

Ricky gave me a lot to ponder as Zola and I walked along the bay trail. Walking is beautiful. You see the world a lot more clearly than the beautiful blur that happens at speed while running, cycling or cruising through life. I miss that blur, but I am savoring the clarity.

Jenny's Light - Post Partum Illnesses

Fellow pro triathlete, Becky Lavelle tragically lost her twin sister, Jennifer and nephew, Graham in December 2007.

To help increase awareness about
postpartum disorders, the family has founded, "Jenny's Light".

Please take a moment and visit the website and pass the link onto your friends.

http://www.jennyslight.org/


Jennifer's Obituary

Wooden on Leadership

One of the wonderful by-products of persuing my masters at the University of San Francisco is the exposure to books and literature that I might not have uncovered otherwise. Currently as part of a Leadership and Criticism course, I am reading "Wooden on Leadership" written by highly respected UCLA basketball coach, John Wooden. I strongly recommend it for athletes, business leaders and anyone interested in how Coach Wooden wove together a strategy for teaching and coaching his teams infusing values, morals and his knowledge of basketball.

If you are an athlete and specifically a triathlete, you are likely focused working on the fundamentals of your sport at this early time in 2008. Whether that be honing your spin and pedaling technique on the bike, your run form/cadence or developing/refining your swim stroke, I thought you might appreciate the excerpt from Wooden's book. Gail Goodrich (UCLA Varsity 1963-1965, 2 National Championships) writes about Coach Wooden and his approach...

"He believed that winning is a result of the process, and he was a master of the process, of getting us to focus on what we were doing rather than the final score. One drill he has was to run a play over and over at full speed, but he wouldn't let us shoot the ball. He made us concentrate on what happened before the shot was taken, what happened to make it possible. He made us focus on execution."

Hypercat Racing athletes are familiar with the mantra of focus on the process (or process goals) and not the results (those come if you focused on the process). In running, cycling and multisport, it is easy to focus on place, time, qualifiying for X etc. However, it is the process involved in getting to those ends that require your focus. The rest takes care of itself.

So...when you are doing isolated leg drills on the bike, swim drills in the pool or high knees, butt kicks, skips etc for the run, think of Gail's comments about what made him and the UCLA team successful under Coach Wooden. Trust in the process.

Back to working on class work,
Rachel

Not What Mom Had in Mind

My brother sent me this picture this morning.
It was taken at my parents home in snowy, Central New York.

Christopher wrote, "I don't think this is what Mom had in mind when she wished for a bird feeder for Christmas."

Yes, those are turkeys! Thanks, Chris!